I often get asked why do I even bother putting myself out there. I have several jobs and am looking to be able to write full time as a career and in order to make that happen I spend a lot of time behind a computer (plus I’m behind a computer in my day job). And there is my regular life of wife, mother, daughter, sister and overall ass kicker. But I get asked a lot about my motivation to put myself out there to be judged. Okay here it is:
My daughter who was born in 2004 changed my life forever. When I was pregnant I thought about what I would pass on to her. I thought about what example I would set for her. Had I lived my life to the fullest? Had I been brave? What kind of woman was I? That year I finished my degree in Business (eight months pregnant). I made sure I finished everything I had left unfinished. We moved and I redecorated the whole house. I read every parenting book I could get my hands on including Jenny Mc Carthy’s Belly Laughs. That’s a good read. I did more research that year than when I was in high school. I made my own baby food and cleaned everything. And as my baby girl gets older (She is about to be 10!) I am making sure to keep being the kind of woman I want her to look up to.
So much of her is me. (And then there is her Dad in her too) But I stopped saying I need to lose weight and started saying I’m eating healthy and exercising. She has my body. I started taking compliments when they are given because she has practically the same face as I do. And I pushed myself further than I ever thought I could because I want her to know no limits. My heart soars when my child says that I’m beautiful and glamorous because I know she think that of herself one day. I know that she can and will surpass me with her endeavors in the future.
She is the reason I do most things.
I’m gonna just leave this here and try not cry. (Damn my girl parts)
And I’ll leave this just because I like it.