Slight OCD with an Insomnia Chaser please.

So I have self diagnosed myself with OCD. I literally see everything that is wrong or dirty and feel the need to fix it. I often have things running through my head all night and can’t go to sleep. And LAWD help me if I have some drama during the day. I can guarantee I am not getting any sleep.

Anyhoo, I have had insomnia since my child was born. It comes and goes and happens in degrees.  The worst is when I stay up all night and right at 5:45 I drift off to sleep only to have my alarm go off at 6am.

I have really tried everything I could think of from soothing sounds to over the counter remedies. I just can’t seem to get it together on a regular basis. I think I have one night a week of just straight blissful sleep. And that’s if I’m lucky.

I know that I could let my OCD  ruin my family so I keep it in check and I don’t spend my time constantly cleaning and nagging even though I want to. Boy do I want to.

I let it out in small doses like steam.  In these instances I might find myself cleaning the microwave with a toothbrush or scrubbing the paint off the toilet seat  And yes these things happen. I even have a problem with keeping my dvr clean. I watch something and I immediately have to delete it. I actually scroll through my playlist like, “Didn’t I watch that?” Delete. I have actually deleted things my husband never even watched or that he wanted to keep by total accident and he did not take kindly to it. I am on automatic at this point.

I think I may need therapy but its cheaper to just clean something.

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2 thoughts on “Slight OCD with an Insomnia Chaser please.

  1. Ugh. Yeah. Insomnia blows. I have some OCD but unfortunately it manifests in different ways — you’d have a heyday in my house. I do get this, though. I have spurts where I clean like crazy and it provides some relief, but it never lasts that long. Sigh… I can dream.

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