I was having this convo with a friend today. This is a familiar conversation that I have alot unfortunately. I know a good man is hard to find. Men do not jump on me here. Y’all know how y’all do. Anyhoo, but it seems like when a woman does finally find a man they go too damn far.
First of all everybody and their mama got to hear about your new man and how blessed you are to have such and such. You can’t go anywhere because you are with so and so. If you do come out the house, you are bringing what’s his name with you. Look, we’re happy for you but…. Sometimes we want to see you without your significant other attached to your face.
Okay so here’s the actual convo. The girl I was talking to has shaped her whole life around this guy. She has almost ceased to be an actual person. All her hopes and dreams are wrapped around this man. She suddenly, likes all this dudes activities and needs to be involved in them. Whatever she wants to do is what he wants to do. I told her she should be in love with him but stay in love with herself.
And then there is the total and complete blind trust in the new S/O. When women start saying stuff like , “My man would never….” I get scared for them. Because he is a man not Jesus. What if he does?….do whatever it is. Then are you going to die? Will you fall apart? And then you’ll be so angry and hurt that you gonna want to catch a case because you’ve given him blah blah blah. ( Fill in the years and stuff you gave up)
Don’t get me wrong. I believe in love. I am a romance writer for Pete’s sake. All I’m saying is don’t put all your hopes and dreams and your whole life in one person. That man is a human being and human beings are not perfect. Love him. Hell love him with your whole heart but don’t forget to love yourself, too. Be realistic in your love. The girl got mad at me because she was offended for her man. Like I knew him personally. I was talking about her not him.
Anyhoo….I could be wrong.
P.S. This is not an attack on women who cater to their men. Everyone is someone in a relationship and if that is you then that is you. I think every woman should take care of their man as every man should take care of their woman.